# Coluche's best lines

Gags by Coluche (1944-1986), the comedian who founded the Restos du Cœur food charity, from his music-hall and radio sketches, with the sketch they come from when known.

- 24 votes · 16 items
- Jul 15, 2025 · Noémie Faure
- https://even.best/en/l/1049/coluche-s-best-lines

## Top 12

1. **The hardest part was the end of the month, especially the last thirty days.** (3 · ▲3 ▼0) — The sketch «The Student».
2. **Frenchwomen, Frenchmen, this year was very good, next year will be worse.** (3 · ▲3 ▼0) — His parody of presidential New Year wishes, «Speeches say a lot».
3. **I'm capable of the best and the worst, but it's at the worst that I'm the best.** (3 · ▲3 ▼0) — One of his most quoted lines.
4. **I don't regret going to war: first of all because I didn't die.** (2 · ▲3 ▼1) — The sketch «The Veteran».
5. **Medicine is a dangerous job: the patients who don't die can sue.** (2 · ▲2 ▼0) — The sketch «Doctors Without Diplomas».
6. **Earning your living isn't worth it, since you already have it.** (2 · ▲2 ▼0) — One of his thoughts on work.
7. **Dictatorship is “shut up” and democracy is “always cause”.** (2 · ▲2 ▼0) — The definition of political regimes according to Coluche.
8. **Not all politicians are thieves, but count your fingers again.** (1 · ▲1 ▼0) — The radio sketch «The Unemployed Man».
9. **I'll stop doing politics when politicians stop making us laugh!** (1 · ▲1 ▼0) — The sketch «Politics», from the time of his 1981 presidential run.
10. **The poor are indispensable. Proof: the Americans have some.** (1 · ▲1 ▼0) — «Speeches say a lot».
11. **The worker knows how the job is done; the boss knows why.** (0 · ▲1 ▼1) — The sketch «They're taking us for fools».
12. **Of all those who have nothing to say, the most pleasant are the ones who keep quiet.** (0 · ▲0 ▼0) — «Speeches say a lot».
13. **There's one country that's nice: Switzerland. It's clean, Switzerland.** (0 · ▲0 ▼0) — The sketch «Holidays».
14. **I know, I look a bit stupid. But the uniform has a lot to do with it!** (0 · ▲0 ▼0) — The sketch «The Cop».
15. **The technocrats, if we gave them the Sahara, in five years they would have to buy sand elsewhere.** (0 · ▲0 ▼0) — One of his most famous lines about technocrats.
16. **Technocrats, these are guys who when you ask them a question, once they have finished answering, you understand the question more.** (0 · ▲0 ▼0) — The logical continuation, still on the technocrats.

How is this ranking ordered? By people's votes: each ▲ adds a point and each ▼ takes one away. Anyone can vote and add what is missing.