Jane Austen's wittiest lines
The top 3 according to 85 votes from people: I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal. · It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. · Happiness in marriage is entirely a matter of chance.. (Updated Mar 1, 2019.)
The sharpest lines from Austen's novels and from her letters to her sister Cassandra, from Pride and Prejudice to Persuasion, each with its source.
Top 15
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1
I do not want people to be very agreeable, as it saves me the trouble of liking them a great deal.
Letter to Cassandra, 1798.
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2
It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.
Pride and Prejudice (1813), opening line.
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3
Happiness in marriage is entirely a matter of chance.
Charlotte Lucas, Pride and Prejudice.
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4
One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other.
Emma (1815).
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5
One cannot be always laughing at a man without now and then stumbling on something witty.
Pride and Prejudice.
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6
A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of.
Mary Crawford, Mansfield Park (1814).
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7
I will not say that your mulberry-trees are dead, but I am afraid they are not alive.
Letter to Cassandra, 1811.
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8
To be fond of dancing was a certain step towards falling in love.
Pride and Prejudice.
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9
Surprizes are foolish things. The pleasure is not enhanced, and the inconvenience is often considerable.
Emma.
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10
Let other pens dwell on guilt and misery.
Mansfield Park, last chapter.
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11
Ah! there is nothing like staying at home for real comfort.
Emma.
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12
Single women have a dreadful propensity for being poor, which is one very strong argument in favour of matrimony.
Letter to Fanny Knight, 1817.
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13
One does not love a place the less for having suffered in it, unless it has been all suffering, nothing but suffering.
Anne Elliot, Persuasion (1817).
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14
What dreadful hot weather we have! It keeps one in a continual state of inelegance.
Letter, 1796.
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15
For what do we live, but to make sport for our neighbours, and laugh at them in our turn?
Mr Bennet, Pride and Prejudice.
Candidates
They don't make it into the top 15… yet. Vote for them to move them up.
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16
People always live forever when there is an annuity to be paid them.
Mrs John Dashwood, Sense and Sensibility (1811).
How is this ranking ordered? By people's votes: each ▲ adds a point and each ▼ takes one away. Anyone can vote and add what is missing.
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Comments (1)
The mulberry trees line is peak Austen. Her letters are as funny as the novels.